SOC Sunday : Getting Back to Couplehood


Thanks to our respite care, we have been getting out a lot more just the two of us these days. And it’s been amazing. Not that we’re having meaningful conversations every time we leave the house. The first time we went out this month, we went and drank beers for two hours with friends and hardly talked to each other. The second time we planned to see Harold and Kumar but balked at paying $23.50 for two tickets, especially when we don’t even like 3D. So instead we ate dinner at the grocery store and then went to a bar where we finished one beer and had a forty five minute teary conversation about the girls.


But last night we finally managed to get it right. We went to see a inter-league bout by our local roller derby team and then out to a late dinner. We were shaken out of our usual routine and spent dinner just chatting. It was the first time in a long time that it felt like us before we had kids. When we were just us.


The last few years with the girls have been more stressful than I could have imagined. They bring us so much joy but with that joy comes a lot of pressure. Sometimes it feels as it my husband and I are just trying to get through this, tagging each other out when necessary, and propping each other up when we need to. I thought it was enough that we weren’t turning on each other but last night reminded me that there’s more than that. That’s there is a a strength and connection between us that goes beyond parenthood.

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  1. It’s great that you are getting more couple time with your hubby. It does feel awakward not to have the kids around sometimes but it does wonders for your relationship.

  2. I’m glad you are getting some time to yourselves! So important 🙂 Glad to “meet” you, stopping by from SOCSunday!

  3. This might be a dumb question, but what is respite care? It sounds awesome. I was just talking to some friends on Facebook about how we haven’t had a date night since July because sitters are so expensive here but there aren’t any other options when you don’t have any family nearby. I know what you mean about maintaining and propping up!!

    • It’s part of the girls social services. We have an awesome non profit in town who helps pay for their therapies, adapted classes, and respite care. We’re able to get some time away, take one of them out with just us, and I use it when I am at a big event by myself with them. Sitters are so pricey that we wouldn’t be able to do it any of that other wise.

      Have you tried asking friends to trade? We’ve done that before. One of us will go watch their kids on a Friday night and then one of them will come watch our kids on a Saturday night.

  4. I’ve always wanted to go to a roller derby! My husband and I played billiards for the first time ever last week, and I had such a BLAST. Enjoy the time together.

  5. My husband has traveled so extensively in the last two years, that he is annoyingly in the way the first 24 hrs he is home … then the next day we ease back in … and then he leaves again.
    We need to go back to dating eachother 😉

  6. We need to get out more often but it seems like whenever we manage to get a sitter, we’re either too tired or need to get our own stuff done. It’s a hard process, reconnecting.

  7. Oh man. I NEVER get out with my husband. NEVER. We don’t have babysitters and don’t like close to family (yet). I’m usually okay with it but this week I realize how much I miss just a nice grown up dinner. Hoping to make it happen soon.

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