Hello I’m Broken, Maybe You Are Too?

Earlier this year, I started noticing a mom at drop off. She has just the style I thought I would have as a mom and just the parenting attitude with her adorable daughter I thought I would with my own girls. As I dragged my kids up the hill morning after morning, I looked at her apparent perfection and went home and cried. If this was a "mom-lit" book, we would bond over some silly thing. Maybe her kid trips and I pull a bandaid out of my purse (a highly unlikely scenario being as I never have bandaids, or a purse.) We would chat and become the best of friends. But in real life, I just fetishize her life from afar as I do yet another morning walk of shame in pajamas. This came to mind yesterday as I instagrammed a picture of my view from the top of a cliff on the California coast. As I posted, I thought about how perfect it looked, a casual afternoon overlooking the ocean. But in the picture, you can not see the tears coming down my cheeks. How much easier would it be if we … [Read more...]

Blogging Without A Tribe

If you are a blogger, did you ever have a post that sat inside of you until the moment was ripe to write it? After Mom 2.0 this year I wrote a never published post called "Is It Time To Say Goodbye To All This" (to someday be linked from my drafts) about how I felt beaten down by blogging and thought maybe it was time to say goodbye to all of this weird online thing. The logic was legimiate. Blogging lost me some very important relationships IRL as we say. Family who didn't get my "voice" online and felt my honesty about parenting was just a little too much. But what stopped me from posting was this blog post from the Bon Bon Break about tribes. My voice is very small. It's honest to a fault and broken at times. It has nothing BIG to say. Instead it whispers small things in the lowest voice you can hear. It's been broken. By fellow bloggers who decided on the opinions of others who I was and then never gave me a second thought. On real life friends who said they didn't understand … [Read more...]

My New Favorite Thing is Me

This post was sponsored by domain.ME and is part of the #ThisIsMe campaign; however, all thoughts and opinions are my own. There's something about turning forty that makes you ponder things. My fortieth is actually in 2016 but as I reflected upon 2014 and the choices and things that had happened, a theme of wanting to do better emerged. And while I was would like to do better in parenting and marriage and cooking and so on, one of the things I really want to do better in 2015 is take care of my, myself, and I. This is ME recognizing that I am the only person who knows what's best for ME. And when I am happy to be ME, I am happier and a better spouse, mother, and friend to those around ME. At the end of the day if I don't take care of ME, I am doing a disservice to those around ME and of course, ME. It feels weird to say ME, ME, ME and celebrate ME but I like ME and I need to treat myself as well as I treat others. So these are my ME resolutions for 2015: 1. Get my eyebrows … [Read more...]

2015 Habits : Resolutions and Commitments

Happy new year! Every year I make the number of resolutions for that year. In addition, I am jumping on the "word of the ear" bandwagon and declaring a word. Mine: HABIT. I picked habit to help commit myself to making my resolutions not just something I cross off a list but something that improves my life and becomes an integral part of my life. They say it takes 21 days to form a habit so I have decided that each month I will concentrate on an area I would love to improve on or change. And then I have picked fifteen things I want to do this year as well. Here they are! … [Read more...]

Seeking the Blessing

There is a certain Irish guilt in me that eschews any comfort. So tonight when among my closest friends it took me hours to break down. My soul did not ask for their blessing or benefication or any their forgiveness. what my former faith expects. Instead, I needed their benefication, their meeting of blessing and approval and support, their reassurance that I am not alone, Sp today, and through this season, I ask of you: -ask not what god your brother or sister worships =ask not what your brother or sister has Ask instead What can I do for others that gives me nothing in return. … [Read more...]

Among the Narcissists and Writers : BlogHer14 Recap

This BlogHer14 recap is sponsored by Mrs. Band and my own personal BlogHer sponsor second year running, Jen Lee Reeves. So another BlogHer conference happened. And even though I said last year was my last one, I was there. Bloggers are an odd species. They are a combination of big loud flamboyant people and sensitive quiet introverts... to stereotype, narcissists and writers. Both have their awesome and not so awesome qualities and I love them both. But I don't think I embody enough qualities of either to feel secure at BlogHer. Being in a large crowd of both is an experience that will shake you up, in good ways and bad. This year the experience of being around so many creative people, combined with an underlying theme of self acceptance left me pondering what blogging really means to me. "Blog fame is fleeting and fickle and largely based on chance." -@TheBloggess Jenny is dropping #truth bombs all over #BlogHer14 .— guavalicious (@guavalicious) July … [Read more...]

Old Before My Time

Maybe it's because I live in the Midwest but lately I have started feeling old before my time. I am still over a year away from forty, but in Missouri I am way over the hill. These chicks were having babies at twenty and while I am stumbling from mommyhood to reentering careerhood, they are confidently navigating barre classes and the corporate ladder in tasteful White House Black Market outfits. But what really confirmed for me that i am old was the offer to do this sponsored post. For Poise Microliners. It has come to that. I am firmly in the target age for light bladder leakage protection. And of course, I blame my kids. After carrying twelve plus pounds of babies to 49 weeks, everything is a little weak. So yeah, laughing a little too hard and squatting a little too hard at those all too infrequent gym visits is like playing a game of Russian roulette. I don't want to be dealing with diapers when my kids are just out of them. Which is why Poise microliners are … [Read more...]

A Rant About Summer & Some Cool Things Too

for years I suffered from SAD, except mine season was summer. i think it started the year I decided to spend the summer potty training the girls. Days of cleaning up puddles and looking at seafoam green tiles almost drove me off the deep end. This year I thought I was going make summer my bitch. How wrong I was. … [Read more...]

Ten Things To Do This Summer

It's summer time! Well not really, since my girls still aren't out of school thanks to the GOT like Winter. But I can't hold it back any longer, so this week is all about summer. In the past, I have attempted extensive summer bucket lists, but this summer I am being realistic and naming only ten things I want to do. … [Read more...]

Prep for Summer : Summerize Your Legs

~This is a paid post through #Collective Bias.~ Was that not the longest winter ever? Once I thawed out, I spent some time over the weekend prepping my legs for summer, especially my knees. Now that the girls can swim, I spend a lot more time looking at my knees as I peer over my book to make sure those are happy screams, not homicidal ones. My summer will be spent being a knee gazer. … [Read more...]